Tag: homosexuality

This Isn’t A Happy Ending. It’s Not Even A Beginning.

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I don’t know how to express this emotion today. I’ve been trying to find the right words but I just can’t.

Have you ever looked at someone and thought “You’ve got everything I’ve ever wanted and I’m not even one step close to getting there” ? It’s how my heart feels today. It’s not jealousy. It’s not hatred. It’s a feeling of longing for something I can’t explain. An emotional freedom to be who I choose to be without fear.

I write this with tears in my eyes because I am so ecstatic for so many that have fought for decades over something that shouldn’t even be considered a privilege. For the incredible souls that have waited all their lives to do something their brothers and sisters were able to do, not because they were any less in love but because the society decided to deem their emotions Invalid.

Today, a part of the world took one step forward towards Human Equality and I couldn’t be more proud.

Screen Shot 2015-06-27 at 12.41.34 pm Today, it has become more blaringly obvious how many steps behind India, as a country, stands. Today, it has been shoved in my face that while someone out there gets to look at the person they love and say “I do” irrelevant of gender, in my country, I still can’t say “I love you” unless it’s to a man.

And I can’t help but cry as I look at the joy on every person’s face half way across the world because this is a joy I doubt I’ll see in my country for a very long time. The joy that gives them freedom to be who they are. The joy that lets them live as they choose to. The joy that will allow them to look into the eyes of the person they love and know that they can be married just like every other couple in this nation.

And how much can an LGBTQ community fight with a society that has made up its mind and refuses to accept change? When we ask for a change in law, the government doesn’t discuss with us. They make up their minds and pretend to listen to what we have to say. How can you arrive at a successful conclusion when, at the beginning of your conversation, you’ve already lost?

We recently had #YogaDay. It was picked up across the world. I couldn’t stop thinking, what is the point of a healthy body if your emotions are still locked up? It doesn’t matter how much yoga or exercise we do everyday, because unless we wake up comfortable with who we are, we will never feel happy or calm. And right now, we’re not all comfortable with who we are because most of our emotions and relationships are still illegal. And did I mention it may lead to a ten-year-imprisonment?!

Marital rape is legal. Marrying the one I love isn’t.

I can’t imagine waking up and having to lie to the people I care about everyday of my life. I can’t imagine not having the ability to hold hands and showcase my love to the world. I can’t imagine not being me every single day of my very existence. I can’t imagine what thousands across this country are going through right this very moment. And I can’t understand why we’re not doing something more about it.

Because I don’t just want to be #ProudToLove. I want to be #ProudToLoveWhoeverIWant and until we get there, this isn’t our victory. It’s not even one step towards it.

“Homosexuality – Love in its purest form : Illegal”

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I don’t know about the rest of the world, but when I watched fairytales as a kid, I didn’t really melt over the concept of a man and woman getting together. I connected with the love that lasts happily ever after. That kind of love that saw no bounds. Like the love from a mother to her child, the love you feel for your first best friend, the love you have for someone that helped you when you were living your worst nightmare, the love you have for your father, your siblings..

Ultimately, the love you feel when you find that one person that fires up your heart. The person who makes your eyes shine with unknown emotions every time they walk in to the room. The person who brings you out of your shell and makes you feel comfortable in your own skin. Someone who accepts you for who you are instead of what they want you to be.

That’s how one feels about their hometown as well. It’s the place that saw you through your good times and bad. The place that lit you up when you felt low. The place where you grew up. The place where you learnt good from bad. The place where you figured out who you are.. The reason it holds that soft spot in your mind is because no matter where you go or who you become, if you ever forget yourself, you come back home and it’ll remind you..

But imagine not having the ability to be yourself at home? The place that’s supposed to support you is now asking you to retreat your steps until you’re back in that closet.. Now, shut the door and hide there. Because if you dare to walk out, you’ll be jailed.

I woke up this afternoon and did the first thing I do everyday. Facebook. The first post on my NewsFeed :-

“Homosexuality illegal : Supreme Court.”

It took me a good two minutes to gather my thoughts and my emotions and I realized, I wasn’t just hurt or upset. I was outraged. This was by far the most ridiculous thing my country had ever done. Which was surprising considering how many they’ve been doing lately. Every time my mother left my country to go visit another one she would say, “Nothing like India. The friendliness, the hospitality, the love.. You can’t find it anywhere else.” Today, I had something to prove her wrong. Because, today, my country had chosen not to support love. Today, my country shut its doors on kids, adults that were not like them. Today, my country chose to say I will love you for what I want you to be, not for who you are. Today, my country decided to turn its back on the people that need its acceptance and love the most.

Remember that feeling I was talking about? That love that turns your world upside down? Making you look at things differently and feel things differently? Here’s the problem with that. Your emotions don’t see what the world and your brain asks you to. Your emotions don’t know caste, race, ethnicity or gender. Your emotions don’t understand the difference between a man, a woman and a transgender. Like the famous romantic-comedy movie title, Love Happens.. You can’t stop it and you can’t run away from it and you sure as hell cannot turn it off just because the people around you think it’s unnatural, immoral and “disease spreading.”

I would like to think that well-educated, well-knowledged people would have the ability to understand something this simple. LOVE IS LOVE. No matter who you are, where you’re from, what you do or how you look. Homosexuality is proof for that.

Someday, this decision will change. Someday, my country, like many others, will pick love over laws. Until that day, I will stand strong and fight for those people who deserve the chance to love and be loved. I will fight till those closet doors break open. I will fight till the people around me can turn those doors to wings and fly high, showing off who they are, with pride, for every one to see. Until that day..